1 by AFriedman18 on April 11, 2010

Nobody Comments on My Posts: So What? They Are Still Listening!

How to Get Facebook Comments

I have a really hot girl-friend named Kristin* One day hot Kristin was complaining about Facebook, saying that nobody ever comments on her status updates, yet she comments on other peoples’ updates. Hot Kristin was annoyed because she is obviously investing a good amount of time into engagement with other people, with the intention of receiving comments back. Even though hot Kristin misunderstands why people interact on Facebook, or on any content or social platform for that matter, doesn’t make her any less sexy.

Unlike blogs, which almost usually need interaction with other blog sites first to get your blog traffic and support roaring, for personal Facebook success you need to already pretend you are popular. Either that, or you need to stop posting stupid Facebook status updates, and you need to understand that Facebook has encouraged stalking, and it is ok for people to read your status updates and not feel obliged to comment. Read on and learn how I KNOW they are reading your status updates, and why you should pretend that you don’t care, but you really really really do.

Facebook Engagement Tactics
(this color is crazy)

  • Don’t just ask a question or make a statement about the lame traffic you are stuck in, ask a question that followers can engage with.
  • Comment on other people’s status updates because you feel like it, not so you can build a following.
  • Try using shortened urls for links to content or photos so you can measure click-throughs. Sign up with Bit.ly, and get an idea of how many people actually click through… Even if they don’t comment. (no cheating and asking your mom to click-through!)
  • Include an image in your status update… Even if the image is not yours. Yup, I said it… Make that voice visual.
  • Delete rude comments from your status updates… They are awkward, make others not want to comment, and reflect poorly on you.
  • Interact with your comments. I know it is fun to see how many other people leave comments, but interact with the comments so your commenters feel acknowledged… most of all, all the people who commented or liked the post just got an email… Hey, this is a post about engagement, not a post about going overboard.
  • Edit your status update or comment in Word first… So that you don’t have to delete and repost, and so your commenters are not getting your before and after comments where you accidentally said “orgasm” instead of “organism.”

Facebook Understandings

  • Commenting on other people’s status updates and posts will not encourage more notice of your posts. Truth is, if your updates are boring, they will still be boring after you comment on 50 status updates.
  • Only people who want to date you, did date you, or hated you in high school will stalk your status updates… Sometimes we just don’t see the post.
  • The funny commenters are usually not that funny and end up being rude… You don’t need them.
  • Your “haha, I’m so funny” probably won’t get a single like or comment
  • Don’t fret, people are reading, listening and seeing your posts… you just don’t know they are there, so try a different posting style
  • The hotter you are, the more likely you are to get comments. Don’t hate it, just accept it and start working out.

What was this post really about, why did it get inspired? Because as I help people to build content online, everybody wants an immediate response… They want business to come pouring in after one or two Facebook group updates. They want people to take more notice of them in Google search results after five blog posts… They plant the social seed, and then assume that people care. Forget about the immediate need of comments, or business from comments or social engagement… instead, pretend that you are on the other side of the screen, reading the content that you are creating. Would you respond, would you read and not respond, would you care?

Sexy Content Takeaways:

- Note the photo to the left… This was 50 minutes after I took the post screenshot… Comments are at 21 as we speak. My point? It was a stupid post that screamed sarcasm.
-  Don’t get writers block, just post and learn from your mistakes. Also, what kind of posts annoy you? Mock those kind of posts.
- Use a hot photo of yourself… Even if it is from 2002.
- Realize that sometimes people are laughing at you, not with you.

*Name has not been changed so that everybody knows I have a girl crush, but not the creepy kind.

Categories: Facebook :: Featured :: Get Comments :: Humor :: Professional

  • http://www.denvermarketingfirm.com Jonathan Roseland

    Excellent info Alexandra! I have a little theory of my own about this topic… You know whats funny is watching the trends of people ‘stalk’ you. For a few weeks they comment ever status you do visit your links, etc. Then for whatever reason you are done hearing from them. Based upon this is I think comments are a very fickle way to measure your level of connectedness or ‘social currency’.

    I think a much better way to measure it is by the real world exchange value of your social media proof. For example if I post a blog or status updates on a subject and then someone in the real world mentions that they see me as an expert on that subject or expresses a desire to do business with me. I see that a much better indicator that I have social currency.

    Anyways social media blah blah blah…. margaritas?