Yes, the title gives away the ending, but the point of the this funny Apple story is the fact that it also provided me with a mini life lesson.
I Was Overprotective of My PowerBook G4
When I graduated college, my parents bought me a brand new PowerBook G4 as a graduation gift, which I respectively named Rely, short for Reliable.
I babied Rely. No, really, I mean, I wouldn’t let anybody touch Rely unless it was an official employee at the Apple store. If my house guest had to borrow Rely, I would pretend that I wasn’t watching them like a hawk as they seemed to peck at the keyboard. Obviously, this issue was something with my own inner child, but don’t worry, I never address this baggage anywhere in this post.
I have no idea where this sense of overprotection came from, but I think it came from the fact that here I was fresh grad, with this amazing and expensive gift, and I knew that the next new computer would be one I would have to purchase on my own.
I would baby Rely for as long as possible, so that I could get the most out of Rely, and wouldn’t have to buy one on my own for as long as possible.
When a Computer Takes a Turn for the Worst: Age 4
Rely got to the ripe old computer-age of 4, and like clockwork, Rely started getting sick, making some odd noise from what sounded like under the keyboard.
At the time, Apple had a program where I could turn Rely in to Apple for something like $350, and they would fix everything wrong with him.
I backed everything up, and shipped Rely off to the Apple support center. About a week and half later, Rely returned, and as I was reloading everything, he seemed back in tip-top shape.
I started transferring everything from my hard drive back on to Rely. The odd thing that was happening was that every time I tried to load any amount of pictures back into iPhoto, iPhoto would crash. This concerned me.
I restarted Rely. I called Apple support. Nothing was working. Basically Rely was a blank slate, and iPhoto would crash every time I tried to add even a couple of photos. Something was not right.
Let’s get this straight people, I don’t know crap about the technical side of computers. I’m pretty sure you assumed that by now. Just owning up to it.
This is not the relationship I had with Rely or the kind of relationship I currently have with computers. I am much more, “tell me what you need and I will make it happen” kind of relationship… I can’t say that I play the same role in human relationships.
Not Enough RAM for iPhoto
iPhoto was crashing and I had no idea why. I made an appointment at the Genius Bar at the Apple store and headed in. While meeting with the gal at the Genius Bar, she informed me that the reason iPhoto was crashing was because I only had like 500 MG of memory.
Wait, What? I remember saying, “Well, I am not sure what that means, but I know when I bought my computer there was like 512 of something.”
She squinted and typed into her computer… She typed for a good 10 minutes. Then, in confusion she disappeared for for a solid 20 minutes. For those 20 minutes I could tell something was wrong. Or, in my case, right…
$350 For Me, $3,000+ for Apple
Out comes the Genius girl carrying a big new box by the handle…Like a giant lunch box filled with peanut butter M&Ms.
She swings the box and plops it delicately onto the Genius Bar. A brand new MacBook Pro to replace Rely. Software would be included she mentioned, the same software, yet updated, of everything that I had on Rely. Everything was for FREE. This included 3-year AppleCare plan. I kid you not.
Here’s what happened, it is really pretty simple…
When I turned in Rely to get fixed, the technicians forgot to put all my RAM back in. Simple as that. In return, I got a brand new computer, fully stocked… A computer over 4 years old got fully replaced for free. I was such a brat about my old computer, and you know what, I guess it didn’t matter, and I guess I didn’t have to learn how to be better at sharing. I should blame that on kindergarten, not Apple.
The best part of my story? I was a crazy overprotective beast with Rely, and I didn’t share it with anyone. Luck would have it, I got a brand new MAC for free.
Update as of 2016: When it was time for my next upgrade, I paid it forward and gave my old computer to a friend for free.