The last time I was on the bathroom floor it was because I was being over-dramatic when I was sick, and the cold tiles cooled down my bare sweaty bum. I mean, cold on your bum actually feels really good when you feel that sick and sweaty and strip down to your underwear… Because, well, just because you want the cold tile on your bare skin, and your bum is the first to hit the ground.
And then there is the over-dramatic bathroom floor sitting when I’m sad or depressed…I sit on the floor and stare up at the sink or bath tub and try to have my own awakening like Elizabeth Gilbert explains in Eat, Pray, Love. It’s when I start thinking about how I need a new loufa, and I wonder if I can find it in orange, is when I am pretty sure that the life epiphany isn’t going to happen from the bathroom floor. Realizing this is actually really annoying, since I had probably scheduled in this epiphany into my calendar, and who knows when I will be able to fit it in again.
But, this time I sit on the hotel bathroom floor in Geneva, Switzerland because I can’t sleep. It’s 4:15am, I’m frustrated that I can’t sleep, and listening to my travel-mate breath like she is soundly asleep makes me want to wake her up to tell her I can’t sleep…So I take a bathroom break, sit on the bathroom floor, and think about what I would be doing if I was back home in Denver at this exact time. Turns out that 4:15am in Geneva, Switzerland is 8:15pm Denver time on Friday. And if I were home, I would be on a date, getting ready for a date, eating dinner on my own before I met some new dude for a drink date, or playing on Facebook thinking about a hot date.
As I sit on the bathroom floor, swearing at my jetlag, I notice the robe hanging near the shower. With as expensive as Geneva is, at $200 for one night in a hotel, I find myself thinking about dating and Facebook, and then, “How dare they only give us only one robe!” Good thing Elizabeth (my travel partner) and I finagled another one from the maid earlier, perhaps getting a second robe makes me feel like I got a better deal in this expensive Swiss city.
Finally, I looked in the mirror and realized that there was nothing I could do about the jet lag, and that chances are, my epiphany wasn’t going to appear because my awakening Gods think I am still in a different time zone anyway, and probably can’t locate me. I imagine that the jet lag will be gone in about a day or so, and then my awakening Gods might be able locate me when I am skiing in the French Alps…Sitting next to a sexy French man who smells of pain au chocolat…Which might sound disgusting anywhere else other than France.