WTF Moments in the French Alps

Worried your kid will fall off the chairlift? Have no fear, the magnets are here! Stick a magnetic bib on your precious kiddo, and when they get on a chair, the lifty thrusts them into the chair and then your kid gets sucked into the back of the seat with a magnet. This is a great idea until you are on the chairlift with the magnetized kid…I felt this sense of responsibility for when we were to get off of the chair…was I supposed to thrust the kid off of the chair? Fight with the magnet? Put myself on the magnet? It turns out that the magnet releases at the top…Was my life meaningless?

I have been back to the cheap ski equipment rental shop three times since I have been here skiing in the French Alps (Sorry, I just can’t get over saying that). Of course my equipment is horrible, that seems standard for paying only 60 Euros for 6 days of renting boots, skis, and poles…But what’s worse is that the cute Frenchman who helped me at the rental shop the three times that I have been there, didn’t seem to recongize me when I saw him in the bar the other night. What, can’t customers get some out-of-office love even when I am not shoving my stinky SmartWool sock toward your face? Or perhaps I just answered my question on why there was no love…Too bad he wasn’t sizing me for Hot pants, I would have been a shoe-in.

Not only has my equipment rental been horrid and painful, but I have fallen more times here in the French Alps (sorry, threw it in again) then I have fallen in one season in Colorado. I seriously fell five times today, and maybe not so surprising, the first thing on my mind to protect when I did fall was both my teeth and my phone…Both of which were expensive, and took lots of patience to finally receive.

We were warmed about the aggressive behavior of a lot of the Europeans when waiting in a chairlift or gondola line, but we had no idea that some of them basically attack you by thrusting their skis over or under yours (whatever you are least expecting), and then continue to ignore you as they try to confuse you with their fast-acting pole stabbing distraction techniques all around your skis. The lines for the chairlifts and gondolas are so aggressive that I usually don’t end up in a gondola with the group of friends I am skiing with. ski group of friends. I’m starting to feel like it’s a survival of the fittest…Get on a lift, or get out of the Alps.

What are your WTF travel stories?

Categories: Featured :: Humor :: Life :: Personal :: Professional :: Risk Taking :: Travel